…nouthetic, Christian care after an affair.
January 14, 2010 by Cindy at AffaircareLeave a comment
Yesterday I wrote on my Portland Infidelity Examiner page:”Save money by saving your marriage after infidelity” and it got me to thinking about this recession and our marriages. When the main breadwinner loses his/her job in a family, and prices go up, it’s natural that there would be tensions in a marriage, and yet statistics indicate that whenever there is a recession, the divorce rate lowers. What can we learn from the generation that got out of The Great Depression about getting out of this recession and saving marriages? The Greatest Generation seemed to be willing to do something that most current citizens and politicians seem unwilling to do, and that’s sacrifice.
Now this is not going to be a big “Rah! Rah! The military is great!” post, but rather a post about sacrifice: foregoing, abstaining, surrendering, releasing, letting go of, delaying gratification for the good of the future or the good of another. If that’s not what love is all about, I don’t know what is! Loving our spouse means that we forgo or surrender ourselves and our wants and our selfishness for the good of the one we love. To get out of the Great Depression, that generation willingly “did without,” saved money, cut down on their expenses, put their noses to the grindstone and worked, kept within their budgets and rations, and any blood they could squeeze out of the turnip they didn’t keep for themselves but used it for others–AND THE GOVERNMENT DID THE SAME! When the citizen was asked to tighten their belt, they didn’t take the money and use it to expand spending and add programs. These qualities were exemplified over and over again in practical and personal ways. I know from personal experience that my Grandmother lived through the Depression, and she cooked in coffee pans, grew her own vegetables her whole life, and learned how to darn and repair her clothes. She recycled, reused and saved EVERYTHING decades before it was “cool” to do so. The Greatest Generation sacrificed for the good of the future and the nation.
This same principle that would pull our marriages out of a “marital recession” after an affair. If your marriage has been rocked by an affair, you can save it fro mthe brink of disaster by foregoing, abstaining, surrendering, releasing, letting go of, and delaying gratification for the good of the future or the good of spouse. Now I am not advocating becoming a doormat or sacrificing forever. Sacrificing for too long can lead to resentment and make your Taker stronger and stronger. No I mean foregoing what you need to offer to your spouse what they need. I mean abstaining from Love Extinguishers that are putting out the fire of love in your marriage. I mean surrendering “what you want” and thinking instead of the other person. I mean releasing your selfish desires and embracing selfless desires. I mean letting go of the bad spirits and pride in yourself, admitting the places where you were wrong, and working on yourself. I mean delaying the gratification of knowing “if there’s hope” for the good of the future or the good of your spouse. You married your spouse until death parted you, and hopefully that 50 or 60 years or more! Even if you two do spend a few years wrestling with and growing from this affair–it’s well worth a few years work for a 60 year investment!
Sacrifice. Tighten the belt and give for the good of the future. It will bring us out of the recession -and- it will save our marriages after an affair.
“&x_ads_imp_theme=”wpcom_adclk_theme;stat_gif += “&x_ads_imp_placement=”+wpcom_adclk_slot;stat_gif += “&x_ads_imp_network=”wpcom_adclk_network;stat_gif += “&x_ads_imp_theme_network=”+wpcom_adclk_theme+”_”+wpcom_adclk_network;new Image().src = stat_gif”&baba=”Math.random();return true;}function wpcom_adclk_click() {if (wpcom_adclk_recorded) { return true; } // no double countingvar stat_gif = “&x_ads_click_theme=”wpcom_adclk_theme;stat_gif += “&x_ads_click_placement=”+wpcom_adclk_slot;stat_gif += “&x_ads_click_network=”wpcom_adclk_network;stat_gif += “&x_ads_click_theme_network=”+wpcom_adclk_theme+”_”+wpcom_adclk_network;new Image().src = stat_gif”&baba=”Math.random();wpcom_adclk_recorded = true;var now=new Date(); var end=now.getTime()+250;while(true){now=new Date();if(now.getTime()>end){break;}}return true;}if ( typeof GA_googleAddAttr == ‘function’ ) {GA_googleAddAttr(“AdOpt”, “1”);GA_googleAddAttr(“Origin”, “other”);GA_googleAddAttr(“LangId”, “1”);GA_googleAddAttr(“Domain”, “affaircare.com”);GA_googleAddAttr(“BlogId”, “13071271”);GA_googleAddAttr(“PageURL”, “http://affaircare.com/2010/01/14/lessons-from-history-on-how-to-get-out-of-a-recession-of-any-kind-financial-or-marital/”);GA_googleAddAttr(“AdSafe”, “1”);GA_googleAddAttr(“Tag”, “affair”);GA_googleAddAttr(“Tag”, “infidelity”);GA_googleAddAttr(“Tag”, “recession”);GA_googleAddAttr(“Partner”, “AOL”);GA_googleAddAttr(“theme_bg”, “ffffff”);GA_googleAddAttr(“theme_text”, “777777”);GA_googleAddAttr(“theme_link”, “009bc2”);GA_googleAddAttr(“theme_border”, “dddddd”);GA_googleAddAttr(“theme_url”, “009bc2”);GA_googleAddAdSensePageAttr(“google_page_url”, “http://affaircare.com/2010/01/14/lessons-from-history-on-how-to-get-out-of-a-recession-of-any-kind-financial-or-marital/”);GA_googleFillSlot(“wpcom_below_post_adsafe”);}div.wpa>div { margin-top: 1em; } #google_ads_div_wpcom_below_post_adsafe_ad_container { display: block !important; }jQuery( window ).load( function() { if ( jQuery(“.wpa script[src*=’virool.com’]”).length > 0 || jQuery(“.wpa script[src*=’shareth.ru’]”).length > 0 || jQuery(“.wpa iframe[src*=’boomvideo.tv’]”).length > 0 || jQuery(“.wpa iframe[src*=’viewablemedia.net’]”).length > 0 || jQuery(“.wpa .sharethrough-placement”).length > 0 ) { jQuery( ‘.wpa’ ).css( ‘width’, ‘400px’ ); }setTimeout(function(){if(typeof GS_googleAddAdSenseService !== ‘function’){new Image().src=document.location.protocol+”//stats.wordpress.com/g.gif?v=wpcom-no-pv&x_noads=adblock&baba=”+Math.random()}},100);} );
Do you love it? SHARE IT!!
-
src=”//assets.pinterest.com/images/pidgets/pinit_fg_en_rect_gray_20.png”/>
Categories: Affair, recession | Permalink.
Leave a Reply
Email (required) (Address never made public)Name (required)Website
You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out / Change )
You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out / Change )
You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out / Change )
You are commenting using your Google+ account. ( Log Out / Change )
Connecting to %s
var highlander_expando_javascript = function(){var input = document.createElement( ‘input’ ), comment = jQuery( ‘#comment’ );if ( ‘placeholder’ in input ) {comment.attr( ‘placeholder’, jQuery( ‘.comment-textarea label’ ).remove().text() );}// Expando Mode: start small, then auto-resize on first clicktext lengthjQuery( ‘#comment-form-identity’ ).hide();jQuery( ‘#comment-form-subscribe’ ).hide();jQuery( ‘#commentform .form-submit’ ).hide();comment.css( { ‘height’:’10px’ } ).one( ‘focus’, function() {var timer = setInterval( HighlanderComments.resizeCallback, 10 )jQuery( this ).animate( { ‘height’: HighlanderComments.initialHeight } ).delay( 100 ).queue( function(n) { clearInterval( timer ); HighlanderComments.resizeCallback(); n(); } );jQuery( ‘#comment-form-identity’ ).slideDown();jQuery( ‘#comment-form-subscribe’ ).slideDown();jQuery( ‘#commentform .form-submit’ ).slideDown();});}jQuery(document).ready( highlander_expando_javascript );
Notify me of follow-up comments via email.
Notify me of new posts via email.
Post navigation← Previous PostNext Post →
Follow our blog
Subscribe to Affaircare and get tips in your email about keeping your marriage affair-free or saving your marriage after an affair!
.
Join 472 other followers
Do you want help delivered right to your inbox?
Download the Affaircare APP!
Affaircare Forums
Romance Calendar
Are you ‘romance-impaired’? Do you need a little help remembering how to be romantic? Here’s one romantic idea every day!
Prayer Requests
Chat with Affaircare
We are on Pacific Time and if we are not available to chat, it will email us!
Follow Us, Like Us, Pin Us, Link to us, Join our Circle!
Feed
Support Affaircare!
And while you’re shopping on Amazon, don’t forget our book: “Affaircare: Caring for Your Marriage After an Affair”!
Meet the CMBA Members!
Click here for links to all the members of the Christian Marriage Bloggers Association
Internet Defense League member
NetworkedBlogsBlog:AffaircareTopics: Infidelity, Marriage, Christian Follow my blog
This entire site, the articles and the blogs are licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License.
Map of our Readers
Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com. | The Yoko Theme.
Top/* */var WPGroHo = {“my_hash”:””};/* ]]> *///initialize and attach hovercards to all gravatarsjQuery( document ).ready( function( $ ) {if ( typeof Gravatar.init !== “function” ) {return;}Gravatar.profile_cb = function( hash, id ) {WPGroHo.syncProfileData( hash, id );};Gravatar.my_hash = WPGroHo.my_hash;Gravatar.init( ‘body’, ‘#wp-admin-bar-my-account’ );});/* */var HighlanderComments = {“loggingInText”:”Logging Inu2026″,”submittingText”:”Posting Commentu2026″,”postCommentText”:”Post Comment”,”connectingToText”:”Connecting to %s”,”commentingAsText”:”%1$s: You are commenting using your %2$s account.”,”logoutText”:”Log Out”,”loginText”:”Log In”,”connectURL”:”http://affaircare.wordpress.com/public.api/connect/?action=request”,”logoutURL”:”https://affaircare.wordpress.com/wp-login.php?action=logout&_wpnonce=4521e4b5ee”,”homeURL”:”http://affaircare.com/”,”postID”:”108″,”gravDefault”:”blank”,”enterACommentError”:”Please enter a comment”,”enterEmailError”:”Please enter your email address here”,”invalidEmailError”:”Invalid email address”,”enterAuthorError”:”Please enter your name here”,”gravatarFromEmail”:”This picture will show whenever you leave a comment. Click to customize it.”,”logInToExternalAccount”:”Log in to use details from one of these accounts.”,”change”:”Change”,”changeAccount”:”Change Account”,”comment_registration”:””,”userIsLoggedIn”:””,”isJetpack”:”0″};/* ]]> */Follow
Follow “AFFAIRCARE”
Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.
Join 472 other followers
Powered by WordPress.com//>WPCOM_sharing_counts = {“http://affaircare.com/2010/01/14/lessons-from-history-on-how-to-get-out-of-a-recession-of-any-kind-financial-or-marital/”:108}jQuery(document).on( ‘ready post-load’, function(){jQuery( ‘a.share-facebook’ ).on( ‘click’, function() {window.open( jQuery(this).attr( ‘href’ ), ‘wpcomfacebook’, ‘menubar=1,resizable=1,width=600,height=400’ );return false;});});jQuery(document).on( ‘ready post-load’, function(){jQuery( ‘a.share-twitter’ ).on( ‘click’, function() {window.open( jQuery(this).attr( ‘href’ ), ‘wpcomtwitter’, ‘menubar=1,resizable=1,width=600,height=350’ );return false;});});jQuery( document ).ready( function() { jQuery.getScript( ‘//platform.linkedin.com/in.js?async=true’, function success() { IN.init(); });});jQuery( document.body ).on( ‘post-load’, function() {if ( typeof IN != ‘undefined’ )IN.parse();});// Pinterest shared resourcesvar s = document.createElement(“script”);s.type = “text/javascript”;s.async = true;s.src = window.location.protocol”//assets.pinterest.com/js/pinit.js”;var x = document.getElementsByTagName(“script”)[0];x.parentNode.insertBefore(s, x);// if ‘Pin it’ button has ‘counts’ make container widerjQuery(window).load( function(){ jQuery( ‘li.share-pinterest a span:visible’ ).closest( ‘.share-pinterest’ ).width( ’80px’ ); } ); (function() { var po = document.createElement(‘script’); po.type = ‘text/javascript’; po.async = true; po.src = ‘https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js’; var s = document.getElementsByTagName(‘script’)[0]; s.parentNode.insertBefore(po, s); })();Send to Email AddressYour NameYour Email AddressCancelPost was not sent – check your email addresses!Email check failed, please try againSorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.%d bloggers like this:
if ( ‘object’ === typeof wpcom_mobile_user_agent_info ) {wpcom_mobile_user_agent_info.init();var mobileStatsQueryString = “”;if( false !== wpcom_mobile_user_agent_info.matchedPlatformName )mobileStatsQueryString += “&x_”‘mobile_platforms”=’wpcom_mobile_user_agent_info.matchedPlatformName;if( false !== wpcom_mobile_user_agent_info.matchedUserAgentName )mobileStatsQueryString += “&x_”‘mobile_devices”=’wpcom_mobile_user_agent_info.matchedUserAgentName;if( wpcom_mobile_user_agent_info.isIPad() )mobileStatsQueryString += “&x_”‘ipad_views”=”views’;if( “” != mobileStatsQueryString ) {new Image().src = document.location.protocol’//stats.wordpress.com/g.gif?v=wpcom-no-pv’mobileStatsQueryString’&baba=’Math.random();}}